Tag: snakes

Expectations

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Why is loyalty an expensive expectation? It’s not like it’s not earned. It is something you have to work for and when it’s given to you, it should be cherished. Yet so many are not loyal. Not loyal friends not loyal to their family not loyal to their country Not loyal to their partners.

If I myself asking this question over and over again, why can’t people be loyal? Is it because of the disloyalty of Adam and Eve? Are we meant to carry the same sin of disloyalty towards others?

It might be that simple maybe not I could be wrong. I hope Someone proves me wrong. If not, I will die knowing that loyalty is something many just don’t get.

Chasing you? Nope that’s a hard pass!

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Disappointed is some thing I have become very familiar with. Just when you start to feel comfortable around people you find out that they are complete jerks. You want to try to do your best, you wanna to fit in but when you realize that you don’t, it’s doesn’t seem to matter as much. As I have gotten older I realize that I’m more comfortable in my skin. As time flows by I realize that the people that I want in my life, won’t ask to be in it. If you don’t want to be in my life, leave. I will never ask you to be in it. If you feel that you want to leave, I am not going to hold you back. I want you to be able to want to stay. I don’t want to be second place, I don’t wanna be the default choice I want to be the one that you choose. If you can’t do that, and if you feel like you’re missing out then by all means walk away. If you think that I’m going to sit here and beg you to stay, you’re wrong. I’m an extremely loyal person and if I can’t get that loyalty back, I don’t want you in my life. It’s not about making the wrong choices. It’s about knowing my worth and I know I am worthy of being loved and being happy. Surrounded by people that want to be with me. Surrounded by people that love me for me. Surrounded by people that accept me for me.

People are like seasons, in the summer you feel the heat of some peoples love. In the winter, you feel the chill and cold you see the real face of people that hide it so much to not show. In the spring, you might find the warmth of the sun that makes you think people can change. Like a rose that is blooming. But just like the autumn season, you see the beautiful colors of change and right before winter the leaves die, the flowers die, and everything dies right before the cold of winter. People are exactly the same way. You may never get to see their real cold side. You may never get to see the blooming rose in the spring and you may never feel the heat of summer, but you definitely get to feel the autumn right before the winter when everything has died.

Some things need to be let go of, I won’t hold you to your word. I won’t even try to win you back. I won’t even try to talk to you to reason with you. Because in the end I chose me. And my choice, I chose to walk away. Because in the end you are not worth fighting for. If you feel, I am not worth fighting for I think we are exactly where we are supposed to be. On the opposite of friendship. You make time for the people who mean something to you. Let this be a lesson to learn that letting go or walking away is more powerful than being surrounded by snakes.

I wish you the best always ~Emma~

Remember Me : written by Emmanuelle-Rose Grace

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Knowing what you did angers me

Knowing the lies you told hurts me

Knowing what you didn’t say breaks me

Knowing the knife you stuck in me

Knowing the scar it will leave me

Knowing the lack of trust I will have because of this injury

Knowing each moment you faked with me

Knowing the words you said weren’t friendly

Knowing you were really insulting me

Knowing that you feel nothing for me

Knowing that you won’t even care to talk to me

Knowing how broken you left me

Knowing the tears sting and burn me

Knowing you were just another snake to me

Knowing everything about me

Knowing I valued loyalty

Knowing you took advantage of me

Forgiveness is something I won’t grant thee

You may have won this fight believe me

Karma is a bitch trust me

Knowing when she comes you will remember me

Knowing that will be the day of Justice for me.

Why bother?

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Trying to get through the week. It’s only Tuesday and I am so over it. Heading to bed wondering why I even care. Care for people that are selfish and only care for themselves. I put myself out there because I am told over and over again not everyone is the same. In my most recent years I have learned that’s exactly what people are all the same. There is not point in trying to build relationships with people. Regardless if it’s friendship or anything else today people are cold and uncaring. Save yourself because no one cares. I speak a lot about being the change you want to see in the world. I want to still hold on to that but I am afraid my faith is falling. I have been hurt too many times to think anyone is different. So I end my night with this post I hope your week is better than mine. ~Emma~

You can’t hide ugly

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Always surprised how people act when speaking of my own mental illness. It’s like mentioning you have the plague. It truly shows their true character that they try to hide behind fake smiles. ~Emma~

Quote:

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“You knew what you were doing and you know it would hurt me but somehow that still didn’t stop you.”

Dear friend: written by Emmanuelle-Rose Grace

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Dear “friend”, I want to say thank you for we no longer speak. Time has passed us by and friends we never really were you see. Things change, I have changed, my heart no longer cares for any of you. It’s strange you love something till you find out it wasn’t worth your time and it never was. You learn to let go not because you have forgotten the hurt or pain but because you no longer need them at all. They no longer exist in your life. You learned a valuable lesson that your “friend” may never see but wish them well. Never look back with regret and don’t forget the only one with the power is yourself. This “friend” I write about doesn’t exist they never did. Complete figment of my imagination because the truth is, real friends would be there for you, only figments of our imagination never existed in our life. So let go of the lie this friend never existed. Tomorrow when you open your eyes it’s your world no one else’s. So erase the figment of your imagination and dive into a new world free from the lie. Stop wasting time on shadows that never existed live in the present with the love around you. Sincerely, the Black Rose

You know Nothing!!!

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Today was a long day. Sitting here about to have a conversation with God and wanted to drop few lines. I finished reading the first Dune book. It was really good and I really enjoyed it. I am looking forward to the next book in the series. I watched the whole Tim Pool/Kayne thing last night. My heart goes out to Kayne. Unfortunately, the world is extremely cruel to ppl with a mental illness disorder. They don’t understand and they are extremely dismissive about anything coming from someone that has any mental health issue. I really do feel for him because unlike many others that assume to know how it feels or understand, you don’t. It’s not easy and you can be compassionate, understanding and love the person that suffers. But at the end of the day you have no clue how hard it is for them to fight to be heard. You have no idea how hard life is for them. You can watch all you like and judge however you like. But unless you are suffering and fighting every day with mental health problems you have no idea. So please do me a favor to all the ppl that think they know….shut up! You know nothing. What that person needs is love, kindness, compassion, understanding, to feel like they are heard and God. If you can’t be any of those things in that person’s life stfu and walk away. I have zero tolerance for ppl that pretend to know how it feels or how they think it is. You have no clue, so stop. My prayers go out to Kayne and all of you whom suffer from any mental disorder. It’s not an easy fight. You fight each and every day but don’t give up. You are not alone. Never forget you are not alone!!! I might be one but together we are many. Always, Emma~

People suck

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It’s always remarkable to me how quickly people turn their back on you. You stand there looking out for them and it quickly becomes “I never asked you to.” Some things we learn over time. Some things we learn through nothing more than being told we cause “drama” by existing. Well I no longer care if you see me as drama. It used to be called loyalty but in a world with no true meaning of anything, I can understand why one sees as drama. The days of me sticking my neck out for others is done. Because this girl no longer cares what happens to anyone. ~Emma~

Storms Wrath

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Storms Wrath

Her heart breaks at his words

Crushing the red dried roses that were once hers

Leaving nothing but dark red broken petals falling towards the grass

As the she lets out a howl from deep within

Crushed by his hateful words of deceit

The stab wounds going deep in her soul

She goes blue like a chill from winter’s brutal cold

Pain freezing her every thought

As her heart stops beating so damn hard

Tears staining her face with marks

She tries to understand what came her way

Lost for words with nothing left to say

Falling to the ground, she grabs the wounds on her way

His words of hate, breaking her once beautiful face

Written by: Emmanuelle-Rose Grace