Tag: poem

New Poetry…

Emma the MizfitLeave a comment

The Widow

Lying in bed with a broken heart trying to understand why I am the way I am

Looking to the right and staring at a blank wall with nothing to say

Looking to the left and staring at the pictures that once hung there

Happy faces and smiles from time shared gone bye

How do I escape the pain from not having you here?

How do I fill this empty bed where you use to lay?

I feel my throat closing as I try to breathe in the last scent of you

The sheets still hold the faint smell of us

How do I escape the touch I need so much?

How do I free my mind from the prison I sit in now?

Tears stain my red cheeks

Sadness grabs a hold of me

My breathing becomes labored

How can I get you back?

I stare at the ceiling the sun shines through the blinds

But all I feel is the pain of not having you by my side

Tell me how can I live in a world you no longer live in

How can I go on without you?

I will do anything to get you back

But I know the one place I cannot get you from is the one place you belong

I turn to the dark side of the bed and hold the pillows tight

Knowing in heaven you will be alright

Written by:

Emmanuelle-Rose Grace

how I am doing…

Emma the MizfitLeave a comment

It has been a very difficult year for me especially the last five months. I did not notice I had gone into a depression until I was in the middle of it. I am working hard with my books and creating content, so I really thought I was fine. It wasn’t till about around my birthday that I realized, I was not just depressed, I was extremely depressed. I have joined group therapy again which is helping me a lot. I am trying some new coping skills to try and change my behavior. The fact that I didn’t even notice I was going through a depression is extremely alarming to me. I can’t afford to allow it to take me over. I spent over 10 years fighting a very dark depression. So, for me being proactive is the only way I can keep myself from falling that deep again. Therapy has always been my go to, coloring, writing, working out all kept me focus. I really thought with the busy schedule, I was doing much better. Now I realized I wasn’t. Why share this? Simple you are not alone. I was so busy trying to focus on the future, what I was doing and how to get there. I wasn’t taking the time to focus on myself. You need to focus on yourself not just work, not just the future and what you want to do. Being proactive when you know you suffer from any mental illness will keep you from losing complete control. It’s important to establish ways to cope and find help when you need it. I made my appointments, told my family and I am going to each session. It is not something I can afford to lose control of, so today I decided to share that with you. Don’t be afraid to fall and seek help when needed. It is not weak to ask for help or find help for yourself. Remember fighting mental illness is a fight that never stops. You wake up, it is part of you and you have to learn to fight it every day. No day will be easy, no day will be lite, each day is worth fighting for. Some people don’t have that battle but it is my battle and if it is your battle don’t give up. You are not alone no matter how many times you feel alone. Keep fighting because each day is worth living. ~~Emma~~

Storms Wrath

Emma the MizfitLeave a comment

Storms Wrath

Her heart breaks at his words

Crushing the red dried roses that were once hers

Leaving nothing but dark red broken petals falling towards the grass

As the she lets out a howl from deep within

Crushed by his hateful words of deceit

The stab wounds going deep in her soul

She goes blue like a chill from winter’s brutal cold

Pain freezing her every thought

As her heart stops beating so damn hard

Tears staining her face with marks

She tries to understand what came her way

Lost for words with nothing left to say

Falling to the ground, she grabs the wounds on her way

His words of hate, breaking her once beautiful face

Written by: Emmanuelle-Rose Grace

Blue Rose

Emma the MizfitLeave a comment

Blue Rose

She tries hard to forget the words that made her feel all alone

Her pulse speeds up trying to catch air into her lungs

Why did she allow him in her heart?

She knows he was dangerous from the start

She thinks of all the mistakes she has done

One after the other she tries to shake all the thoughts

The cruelty in his words

The lies he told

Made her feel safe within his embrace

She stares in the mirror at her face

Wondering who is standing in her place

She tries to remember the girl she once was

The way her smile and laughter lite the room

Her presence was something to behold

Or at least that is what she was told

Her eyes filled with tears

The smug of black that stain her red cheeks

Her heart has been torn out of her chest

She tries to breath out but her lungs forget

Slowly she falls to the floor

Darkness takes a hold of her and she is no more

She screams in pain but doesn’t make a sound

Death was the only escape she sought

Written by: Emmanuelle-Rose Grace

Two headed Snake

Emma the MizfitLeave a comment

Two headed Snake 

Liar liar is all one sees

Tall tales is what thou repeats

No words of truth fall from thee

Just tales of lies thou sows and weaves

Spinning tales of deceit 

Deception of how good to be

Making others wonder how thou can be

Manipulation is truly thy greatest masterpiece 

Telling lies how great one can be 

Twisting and turning people to fit the monster’s needs 

Liar liar that is all thou will ever be 

Today mine eyes were opened to see 

The two-headed trickster dining at my feet 

Written by: Emmanuelle-Rose Grace

To my old clan- Adieu

Emma the MizfitLeave a comment

Adieu

There are no words I can say that will ever make this okay.

There are no words to ever be told to make the truth ever sound sweet.

Lessons are learned from the mistakes we’ve made.

Lies and deceit are ever so instant nowadays.

Loyalty and love dead at the scene.

Words upon the alter sacrificed and slaughtered at your feet.

My love for you upon that slab beaten and battered.

I will take my memories, walk away, while my tears fall and splatter.

But remember one thing it was you I chose day after day.

With nothing left to say sweet goodbye are the last words you will hear me say. —Mizfit Queen aka Emma

Written by: Emmanuelle-Rose Grace