What things give you energy?
Working out gives me energy, going through one of my bipolar highs gives me a lot of energy. Maybe sometimes a little too much energy it can be overwhelming for others. But two things that give me a lot of energy.
Tag: keep fighting
Mom
Mom you are the light in my world You are the stone that keeps me grounded You are my lighthouse on a stormy night on the sea You are stars and moon …
Mom
Gets better with age
What do you think gets better with age?
You learn to spot fake bullshit people faster. You no longer have the patience to deal with them wasting your time, so you just learn to cut ties. You can say it’s heartless but the truth is life is too short to be surrounded by people that don’t care about you. The older you get the more you understand your time is valuable. You stop wasting time on others. I myself am learning to do this. It’s not easy but we all must learn when it’s time to just walk away from a situation or people. Some might call it being selfish. I call it learning from your past and growing. The beautiful thing about aging is becoming wiser. It’s something you can’t know at 21, it only comes through lessons and time.
Things that help me in my daily life
What strategies do you use to increase comfort in your daily life?
I do a few things each day to help me prepare for the day. I don’t know if they work for comfort throughout the day or just helping me to stay focused. I usually start the day thanking God for waking me up, as always. I ask God for strength to get through the day. I also ask God to help me stay focused on whatever things I must complete. I try to stay active, working out in the evening or going for a walk. If I am dog sitting, most of the time is spent either walking them or playing with them. If it’s a day I don’t have dogs I am trying to focus on the things I need to do in the house. I also spend time making videos, in Twitter spaces, blogging and playing games. All of these things are for helping me build what I want in the future. It takes a lot of time and can be extremely exhausting. For instance if you spend time on Twitter trying to get a following you have to be active and in order to be active your followers must see you engaging with them and others which takes time and a lot of energy. I usually spend the night hunting in the game of thrones conquest game. Farming there relaxes me and whenever I feel stressed I go into the game and farm. It helps me to do something mindless without having to think. I will listen to music or put something in the background so I don’t have to think. I do this as a coping strategy and it really helps me. Singing some 80’s songs while hunting critters in the game absolutely makes me feel free from the thoughts of the day. After I have cleared my mind I usually read a verse in the Bible or do my daily devotional. It depends if I did it in the morning or saved it for the night. I will usually spend time talking to God from my bed. The way I see my relationship with God is like any other relationship you have to talk to him. So I spend sometime chatting with him about life my problems and what I would like to do the next day. Again these things work for me and might not work for others. I refer a lot to God because I went through a really dark time and it was Him that pulled me out. For me there is nothing greater than God. If it’s a late night and I am not going to bed yet I watch something that will either make me happy or laugh. I watch a lot of old movies because most of the modern ones are so filled with politics and social issues that I really don’t want to care about while relaxing. Self care is one of the most important things I feel our society doesn’t promote enough. Mom’s and dads need time to relax away from the kids. It’s the same with everyone else we all need time for ourselves to prepare for the next day. Praying or meditating can be a way for anyone to find some sort of peace in the crazy of a busy life. These things work for me and I hope you find they work for you.
Lessons to learn
I wish I could write from a place of positivity but life is harsh and cruel. I am grateful for waking up this morning. I am also grateful for the tough lessons I must still learn. They are painful lessons but they must be learned, to make a better person. Yesterday, I prayed on some things and this morning I got the answers. It’s not a choice I wanted to make, but sometimes it’s something we must do in order to find ourselves on the right path. There is a saying about dangerous prayers, if you ask God for something what you get might not be the answer you asked for. The answer isn’t always what we want when we ask for God’s help. It’s for Him to take control and if we truly believe that He is in control we must listen to what He is telling us. It might not be what we wanted but it will be the path God wanted us to go. These are what they call dangerous prayers because He will answer the prayer. In my own life I have been blessed to have some of my own dangerous prayers answered. Some in a good way that I was so excited and other times I lost people I loved or doors that closed. I have asked for others in those dangerous prayers and have seen them take a different path right before my eyes. God is working in our lives, we just need to be able to surrender and give Him full control. It might not be what we wanted but the truth is we don’t know the future and if He pulls something from your life it’s because He needs you somewhere else. Like I started this blog, life is harsh and cruel and I want to be the positive hope you see. But in honesty even my hopes are broken when what I want isn’t something for me. We must learn to accept the disappointment and learn to become stronger from the lesson. Not everyone is meant to be a chapter in your story. Some are just meant to be side characters or tiny little paragraphs on one page. They are not meant for more than the lesson you learn and they serve that purpose. It is up to us to learn the lesson and grow from that. I hope you all have a beautiful blessed week. ~Emma~
Grateful
How do you express your gratitude?
Each morning I wake up and thank God for allowing me to wake up. I ask Him to grant me the strength to face the day. At the end of the day before heading to bed I thank God for all the little things. I also thank Him for the big things but especially the little things that I might not give thanks for in my prayer. The way I see it is God is constantly in your day, every single moment of your day, so ofc He knows what you go through. So I might thank Him for one particular thing because I forget when praying at night. So I make sure to include the little things that have slipped my mind and express my gratitude for Him getting me through that moment. We all get overwhelmed by life, other people in our lives, feelings, issues that nag us, things we wish we could change but can’t because it’s beyond our own power. These things make us feel sad, depressed or even just overwhelmed with stress. It is those moments that I lean on God the most. This weekend I was completely hurt by an individual that went out of their way to hurt me. Was it necessary, no it made me feel like crap. I prayed and asked God to give me the strength to not get angry to just move on and He helped me. Am I still hurt of course I am but I am also learning and growing, trying to become a better person. I can’t do that alone, no one can. Even when you are having the worst day in the world and your life is completely in chaos, there is still something to be grateful for. You just need to find it and learn to practice being grateful. It is one of my coping skills and it doesn’t always work but learning to be thankful even for waking up in the morning is a start. It’s something I try to live by and it’s something I try to teach others to use as a coping skill. A thankful heart is one that can always find hope even in the midst of darkness.
Future Heartbreak
What are you most worried about for the future?
That we will live in a perpetual state of treating people as others. Meaning, we are living in a society that no longer values other people. The society we live in treats people as if they don’t matter. The constant diminishing of our values of the way we see each other and respect each other is gone. Instead of lifting each other up, you have people tearing each other down. It is what scares me the most with the youth. Trying to live under these rules of what life should be like through TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, whatever app, whatever social influencer, they want to copy their lives after them instead of trying to find pride and respect in each other. It truly breaks my heart.
Moody AF
It’s been a super moody day for me. I am in such a bad mood, I have tried all my coping strategies to try and change it. Nothing has worked so far unfortunately. Maybe it was the whole weekend I don’t know. I just don’t know what to do about it. I walked this morning with the dogs, played with them, played the game, it’s this sour moody cloud over me that has set in. It has made me just unbearable. Everything is pissing me off, especially things that wouldn’t piss me off usually are definitely pissing me off. I am trying to be the positive person that doesn’t want to get too upset or too down on myself. This morning seemed fine but I quickly turned. I think the problem is me and it’s always been me. I invest so much of my energy to others that I forget about myself. I don’t even know why I do it. It’s like complete insanity yet I still do it. I know just another rant about my thoughts. I hope your weekend was better than mine. I am still grateful for the small victories. It’s just this cloud over me doesn’t feel good right now and I feel I am to blame somehow. As if I was the one that set myself up to fall into the pit. I end this Sunday blog with a small victory for me today. The team(game team) I am currently playing with locked with a seat of power. It really isn’t a big deal, wasn’t even a big seat of power but the amazing feeling of getting that sop brought me back to my first big clan I joined. And when we first locked with our first 3 star. We were so excited about it, from that point on it was a fight every weekend. Took months of hard work but we finally found ourselves holding everything. I bring it up because it was definitely the highlight of the day and it brought me back to a time that was so much simpler. So even in the midst of darkness God shines his light to remind me things will get better. I hope today is a blessed day for you all. ~Emma~
Making choices
Sometimes we try to make things fit together when they don’t belong together. Sometimes we try so hard that we forget somethings were never meant to be. It’s hard to admit, we think we can control things, only to learn we control nothing. It’s something we all must learn the hard way. Either through pain, tears or just experiences. We control nothing but ourselves and even that is hard sometimes. Learning to try and control your emotions, feelings, crazy outbursts or drama is hard. For myself it seems sometimes like a never ending battle to try to gain control of myself. I hate feeling pain and rejection, it’s something no one ever gets used to. Pain you learn to just embrace without letting it drown you. On the other hand rejection makes you feel as though you did something wrong. You ask yourself, what is it about myself that makes me not likable. Sometimes it might be your fault, allowing the wrong people in, allowing people that don’t deserve your love. This isn’t about being better than another person it’s about finding out sometimes some things are not worth fighting for. Time pardons no one and doesn’t wait for one to get their crap together. We must learn to move forward without looking back. It’s okay to learn from our mistakes and grow from them but it’s better to not dwell there. I know how hard it is, I myself am trying my hardest to move forward without looking back. I don’t want to let go but unfortunately like I said before time pardons no one. Life continues to move forward we must learn to do the same. Either we move forward or stay the same, doom to repeat the same mistakes. Have a beautiful weekend. ~Emma~
Finding my own way…
Are there things you try to practice daily to live a more sustainable lifestyle?
After I became sick I was on many medications that made me gain a lot of weight. Always being thin I had no clue how it felt to gain so much weight. After years later and I started getting better at controlling my moods I also started to control my weight. Seeing how all the weight was gained because of the medications, I was slowly taken off most of them. With my doctor’s approval. I lost so much weight but I am no where near the weight I was before becoming sick. So I spend my time dog sitting(my business) which helps to keep me active. It keeps me walking and constantly moving. It has helped me mentally and physically taking care of the dogs. I eat healthy meals and focused my goal to return to me original weight. It’s harder now that I am older but I refuse to give up. Learning to live life after being sick and learning ways to combat the slide of any mental illness is not easy. It’s a constant battle for me each day. Dog sitting is one example of my many ways of trying to live a sustainable lifestyle. I find different things to keep me growing into a better version of the person I was yesterday while also learning to live a better day today. It’s not easy but I try to keep my focus and just ask God to help me each day. It takes time to learn how to find a balance within yourself. But it can be done, again not easy but totally worth it when you get there. Finding the path to a healthy lifestyle while growing, learning to become a stronger person mentally, emotionally and physically will be beautiful when I reach my goal. As for now I take it one day at a time, one walk at a time, one meal at a time, one coping skill at a time. It’s hard especially when you want to give up when life gets so dark but you must never giveyes up. My number one thing I do each day is thank God for waking me up and I ask to give me the strength and He does. I am still learning to not suffocate people instead enjoy the silence alone. I am trying to learn to take time for myself. I am also trying to learn to allow space for myself for my feelings for my thoughts. While also learning to give people the space that they need. While also learning to give people the space that they need. These are some of the things I do to help me live a sustainable lifestyle. Learning to respect myself and others, and giving time for things to grow. I hope the reading this you can learn something to. Have a beautiful night\day. ~Emma~
Emma the Mizfit 