I feel so stupid when we talk. Not because I can’t talk to you but because you make me feel dumb. You say I spin in circles and you are right. I try so hard not to but I am trying to fix that and make it right. I hate the feeling of disappointment I hear in your voice. I hate feeling like no matter what I do you I will never be your choice. I hate that I care. I hate that I become jealous for reasons I can’t explain. I hate that when I talk to you I feel safe. I hate that when I say something you get so mad. I especially hate when you make me laugh. I want to stay mad but can’t. I want to hate you but I can’t. I hate to care and think of you all the time. I know you don’t have feelings but that doesn’t change mine. Lost in the deep sea of reflection. Darkness consuming my mind. Trying to escape in the incoming flood. Lost in the sea of your non existent callous heart. ~Emma~
Tag: friendship
Best advice
What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?
A real friend will tell you the truth even if it hurts your feelings. Others will lie and not tell you the truth. Why because they don’t care if you look or sound stupid, but I do.
Save yourself
Sometimes no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try you will never be good enough for him. It’s something you need to learn, no matter how much you try to be the one you aren’t. So accept the defeat and learn to just walk away. Somethings are worth fighting for, others aren’t worth your time. Learn the difference it will save you time and energy. ~Emma~
Be careful what you throw away…
Don’t throw away something you will miss. Once it realizes it’s no longer needed, it will never belong to you again.
Remember Me : written by Emmanuelle-Rose Grace
Knowing what you did angers me
Knowing the lies you told hurts me
Knowing what you didn’t say breaks me
Knowing the knife you stuck in me
Knowing the scar it will leave me
Knowing the lack of trust I will have because of this injury
Knowing each moment you faked with me
Knowing the words you said weren’t friendly
Knowing you were really insulting me
Knowing that you feel nothing for me
Knowing that you won’t even care to talk to me
Knowing how broken you left me
Knowing the tears sting and burn me
Knowing you were just another snake to me
Knowing everything about me
Knowing I valued loyalty
Knowing you took advantage of me
Forgiveness is something I won’t grant thee
You may have won this fight believe me
Karma is a bitch trust me
Knowing when she comes you will remember me
Knowing that will be the day of Justice for me.
Lord of the Rings
What movies or TV series have you watched more than 5 times?
Lord of the Rings all 3 and the extended version. I watch them at least 4 times a year. They are my favorite movies to watch. Idk how many times I have actually watched them but I would probably say over the years probably a 100 times and that’s probably just a low number.
Feelings ?!?
What do you say to a person that is your friend that you may have feelings for them? You don’t want to ruin what you have but you can feel all these things you never knew you felt. Stupid I know, that’s what I keep saying. Don’t fall into old patterns. And it’s stupid because he is not like any other person I have ever met. Is it stupid? Am I crazy? To feel like I genuinely like them. I don’t know maybe I am stupid and completely reckless with my heart. But it’s like when we speak, even speaking of him being with another person, my heart feels something. It’s dumb I know. I just don’t know anymore. He makes me question everything. He makes me feel like I can achieve my goals. I can find my own happiness and it just feels like he takes joy in me becoming a better person. I know I shouldn’t even entertain the ideas, if I do it will just mess up our friendship. I love our friendship I don’t want to ruin that I want to be honest and just love him. Maybe just being his friend is enough love and not expecting anything back. I am stupid I know but I do know I don’t want us to not be friends. He is extremely important to me and I can’t lose him. Not over emotions that I am sure he doesn’t have. So I will stay positive and allow time to do it’s thing. Just working on myself. Yes I am sharing my own personal crazy thoughts. I hope the new day brings you much love and a beautiful day. Remember be the reason smiles today. ~Emma~
People suck
It’s always remarkable to me how quickly people turn their back on you. You stand there looking out for them and it quickly becomes “I never asked you to.” Some things we learn over time. Some things we learn through nothing more than being told we cause “drama” by existing. Well I no longer care if you see me as drama. It used to be called loyalty but in a world with no true meaning of anything, I can understand why one sees as drama. The days of me sticking my neck out for others is done. Because this girl no longer cares what happens to anyone. ~Emma~
Emma the Mizfit 