Tag: family

Finding love

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How does one truly find love? Now I am not talking about the love of family, friends or even the love of God. Though all these are important, I am speaking of love from a partner.

I believe there must be a connection to the person, whether that be a person that is attractive to you by some sort of beauty, personality, a quality that makes them more outstanding than others.

I am one that personally goes by the smile I see on a man. For me a man that has a beautiful smile is absolutely a must. Not anything other than the fact that when a man has a genuine beautiful smile it usually means he will make me smile. I love to smile and I love to have someone that makes me laugh.

In a world filled with so much darkness it’s nice to have a companion that can make you smile. Smiling can change anyone’s day. It’s like walking into work and passing by a coworker that greets you with a genuine smile and says have a beautiful day. Somehow that makes you feel better, it brightens your day, it lightens your mood. Did that coworker know all that m, probably not nor did they probably think about it. But that coworker just changed your day. I use this as an example because it has happened to me and I am sure it has happened to you. It’s why I always speak about smiling because you never know whose day you might change just by a smile.

So this brings me back to love a smile is a definite for me. I have not found love yet and maybe when I find it I will know. It is extremely hard to find love today for the simple fact many men search for beauty, youthful girls and I cannot compete with a 20 year old. That just isn’t happening I have accepted that and I am completely fine with that. There are a lot of things girls that are single will do that I won’t. I have respect for myself and expect the same from the man I date.

There has to be more than just a smile that connects two people. There has to be more than attractiveness that connects two people. Both are fleeting and won’t make anything last.

There has to be things other than outside appearances that connect two people to truly make you find that connection. Common goals, common dreams, common beliefs, these are things I truly believe make connections last longer. Leading to the path of find love. Being able to have conversations with that person about anything because you trust them. Or even sit in silence with that person that is a connection very few have.

Love is a feeling. I love music, I love writing, I love walking dogs, I love playing with dogs, I love the seasons and when they change, I love Christmas, I love roses and how they are full of thorns. I love having conversations with men and learning about what they like and don’t like. I love hearing about passions. I love being myself and I love finding someone whom I can be myself with. I love a lot of things.

So I guess finding love is somewhere in between all that. Love is more than just feeling it’s also having that connection with a person. Going through the pain, happiness, sadness together that is love. Have I found it, not yet. But one can never lose hope. Hope is eternal and I like to keep hope alive always.

Fate/Destiny

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Do you believe in fate/destiny?

I do believe in destiny/fate. I believe people come and go in your life the way they are supposed to and leave you learning the lessons you needed to learn. Now does that change the choices we make I don’t believe so. I see it from the perspective that God knows everything. He has already seen how everything will play out and knows exactly how we will choose. He doesn’t stop us from making our own decisions but He already knows the outcome. When we give ourselves to Him completely we are giving into a power beyond ourselves. We are allowing Him to direct us down the path we should go. It’s a form of fate and destiny because we have given Him ourselves to His direction. So I do believe fate plays in our lives just not the way we think it might be playing.

Be yourself

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If you could be someone else for a day, who would you be, and why?

I know this is going to sound silly but honestly I wouldn’t want to be someone else. What has made me unique, what has made me, ME, are my life experiences. The dark times I have gone through, the happy times and the times of complete insanity shaped me into who I am today. I love completely, I hide nothing, I trust easily, I try to live with no regrets and move forward. I have an open heart and don’t hide my feelings well. I don’t act fake and won’t pretend to be fake. It is a weakness and a strength. So I wouldn’t want to be someone else even for a day.

Advice to my teen self…

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What advice would you give to your teenage self?

The advice I would give myself as a teenager would be, “don’t allow anyone to control you. That starts by learning to not react to others. Learn self discipline and learn to control yourself. Learn that you can’t change anyone. Learn that you can’t control the circumstances of life. Learn to grow from each situation. Each thing that happens in life will be for a reason, even if you can’t see that now. Allowing your emotions to cloud your mind, leads to you making choices you might never have chosen if you had a clear mind. So allow yourself time to reflect. Allow yourself time to hurt. Allow yourself time to be alone, away from others. Allow yourself to be comfortable in the quietness of yourself. Never give anyone the power over you and that can only start by controlling yourself. Most of all don’t forget that no matter what, you are never truly alone. God will always be with you.”

Growing old

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What were your parents doing at your age?

Getting older and sicker as they grow old. We take our parents for granted forgetting one day they will no longer be around. I want to enjoy as much time with them before they are gone. Hear all the stories of the past and learn things from each memory they share with me. Keep and cherish our time together. Because tomorrow isn’t promised but today we can hold onto each other and share the moment.

Feelings

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Do you need a break? From what?

I need a break from my feelings. I am one of those people that cares about everything and everyone. Constantly worried about people that no longer have a place in my life. I worry about them not knowing if they are okay or doing well. It’s just a super annoying feeling to constantly have feelings about other people. Especially people that can’t even be bothered to care about you. I know I shouldn’t care, I know I shouldn’t worry, I know I should just ignore it all but I still care. So yeah I wish I could take a break from feeling anything. I wish I could be as heartless as others. I wish I could be free from feelings, unfortunately I am not and it is part of who I am.

FaceTime

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The most important invention in your lifetime is…

FaceTime it allows you to see your loved ones no matter where they are in the world. Though it will never be the same as holding and hugging the people you love. It gives you the opportunity to speak to them daily. It better than cellphones. Because again you can be with the person see their face enjoy the time together even though you are in different parts of the country or even the world. It’s definitely the greatest invention during my time.

Scars Fade

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How do significant life events or the passage of time influence your perspective on life?

Each life event we go through as human beings we either learn and grow from that experience. Or we learn nothing and stay in a perpetual state of victimhood. We are all struggling, fighting our own demons or just simply fighting life. It is through these trials that we become stronger and learn from our past mistakes. Not taking the time to learn from our past mistakes will allow us to continue making the same mistakes over and over again. I have learned in life that we must change our perspective, focus on the goals we wish to obtain and let go of the things that we cannot change. Doing this, I have allowed myself to become stronger and not defined by my past. This has also allowed me to be open about my feelings, my sickness and not hide who I am. It’s given me great strength. It has me freed me to be myself. Growing constantly into a better version of myself. It has given me the confidence that I need to be comfortable in my own skin. I may not be perfect, I am extremely flawed and extremely chaotic but I have learned there’s only one like me. Through time life events are like scars, they never really go away, but they fade. They stay a part of you as a lesson, but overtime you can hardly see them.

Farm life

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What would you do if you won the lottery?

I would buy a huge farm where I can grow my own food, have lots of dogs, chickens and other animals. Hire people to help me run the farm. I would rescue of bunch of the dogs from the shelter. Yeah even save some of the them cats at the shelter. Build a grand house where my whole family can live. But also build different guest houses on the property so they can stay, while also having privacy for themselves. Though while staying they would have to do tasks around the farm to earn their stay. We would all have to eat dinner together as one family. I know it’s crazy coming from a girl that grew up in the city but honestly I think that would be the best life.

Be the light

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What is your mission?

To find the path God wants me on. I want to be an explain of His love and His patience. He has given me so much I want to repay that by showing what He had done for me. I want to be the light He gave me in my darkest moments. Also to bring awareness to the mental health issues and how is the only answer.